Zesty Dew
sample tin
makes 5 cups
$6
3oz pouch
37¢ per cup
$14
5oz tin
38¢ per cup
$24
A bold and energizing iced tea that channels the lively, citrus-forward zest of Mountain Dew. The invigorating base of Citrus Mate delivers a natural boost, while Citrus Mint Green adds refreshing layers of complexity, combining bright citrus with a cooling mint twist. A touch of Lemon Soleil brings a sweet, uplifting brightness to the blend, and the lemon peel add-in enhances the zesty finish with a tangy, citrusy punch. Perfect for those who crave an energizing, refreshing, and citrus-packed experience, Zesty Dew will keep you revitalized all day long.
High caffeine | Steep at 175° for 2 mins
Signature blends are not eligible for returns.
ingredients & lore
blended with yerba mate tea, black tea, green tea, spearmint leaves, lemon grass, lemon verbena, orange, natural lemon flavor, natural orange flavor & marigold flowers
teas: lemon soleil, citrus mint green & citrus mate
accented with lemon peel
The Dew Detox: A Tea Puddle Origin Story
In the distant year 2025, after centuries of Mountain Dew consumption that left my DNA practically radioactive, doctors informed me my blood was 62% citric acid and 38% caffeine. Like Fry at the Slurm Factory, I'd discovered the horrifying truth — I wasn't drinking the Dew; the Dew was drinking me.
"You're basically a human Dew factory," my doctor said, examining my glowing green urine sample. "One more can and you'll mutate into something even Dew McKenzie wouldn't party with."
Desperate but unwilling to abandon my beloved citrus lightning rush, I traveled to the ancient Tea Sanctum of Adagio, where master brewers had been perfecting botanical alchemy since before the first soda can hissed open. There, they created this blend: the perfect combination of Lemon Soleil, Citrus Mint Green, and Citrus Mate — accented with lemon peel.
The first sip was revelation: that same sweet electric charge, the familiar body tingle, the smooth yet burning sensation... but without the radioactive afterglow. My cells rejoiced as the yerba mate delivered caffeine in harmony with nature rather than chemical chaos.
Today, my veins no longer glow in the dark, but my taste buds still party like it's the 1990s. This blend doesn't just mimic the Dew — it's what the Dew wishes it could be: sweet lightning in a cup that won't leave you saying "Wimmy wham wham wozzle!"
this tea is part of the Soda fandom
Love Zesty Dew? This is just one of 6 teas in this fandom. Check out the whole series.
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